Praise be to Allaah.
Masturbation using the hand and otherwise is haraam for both
men and women, because of the evidence which you will find mentioned in the
answer to question no. 329.
Both spouses have the right to enjoy one another however they
wish, so long as they avoid menstruation and the back passage. There is
nothing wrong with him masturbating you by hand and vice versa.
What you have mentioned about your desire not being fulfilled
may be dealt with by speaking frankly with your husband and by each side
being open and honest with the other, by each of them being aware of his or
her responsibility and by both of them being eager to achieve happiness,
tranquillity and love. Many husbands neglect the wife’s rights with regard
to intimacy and fulfilment of desire, and this usually stems from ignorance
about women’s nature and their differences from men with regard to this
action. Speaking frankly, trying to deal with the matter and reading some
books on this topic all play a major role in setting things straight, in sha
Allaah. If the woman has the habit of masturbating, that may make her lose
interest in her husband and she may not feel any desire for intercourse, or
it may not be enough to satisfy her. This is one of the harmful effects of
masturbation that has been mentioned by specialists.
See also question no.
May Allaah help us all to do that which He loves and which
And Allaah knows best.